chapter 11

The next morning, when Sandra woke up, she couldn't remember her dream, but she could remember how it felt. Somehow, she could remember feeling scared, but angry at some other source. Then, those feelings turned inward on Sandra. She hoped her schoolwork would keep her mind off everything.

Sandra walked through the front doors of school and immediately felt as if everyone were staring at her. Putting her head down, she pushed her way through the crowds of people. As she got to the stairs, she realized she had been holding her breath. She took a deep breath as she quickly climbed the stairs, almost pushing people out of the way.

As she got to her locker, she felt a small sense of relief. Sandra knew she was just being paranoid; there was no possible way anyone knew yet. She pulled the books for her first class out of the locker. As she closed the locker door, Stacey seemed to pop up out of nowhere.

"Hey Sandra!" She said enthusiastically. "Where were you yesterday? You missed a lot of stuff!" Stacey rambled on as Sandra began to walk to class. Barely hearing anything she said, Sandra cut Stacey off in the middle of a sentence.

"Stacey, I'm really sorry, but I don't feel like talking today." Sandra turned to Stacey, hoping she'd understand.

"Okay." Stacey stuttered, seeming taken aback. Without saying another word, she turned and walked away.

Sandra sighed. She knew she had hurt Stacey's feelings, but there was nothing she could do now. Hopefully, Sandra would feel more up to talking to her at lunch. She turned and walked into her class. No one had shown up yet.

As Sandra took her seat, she arranged her desk the way she always did. She looked at her neat, organized desk, and suddenly, for reasons Sandra couldn't quite understand, she resented it. She pushed everything off her desk and slightly smiled at the sound of everything crashing to the ground. Imene walked in as she was picking the last of her stuff off the floor. Sandra heard some people walking into class.

"Did you drop your stuff?" Imene asked, confused.

"Something like that." Sandra said, settling back into her seat.

Sandra never concentrated so hard on her school work before. She took exaggerated notes and found herself doing extra questions out of the book if she finished her assigned work. For the first time in her high school career, she wished her classes would last longer.

It seemed ironic to Sandra that the minutes seemed to fly by when she didn't want them to. She stared at the clock during her class just before lunch. It was as if she were trying to will the clock to move slower. She silently begged the clock's hands to stop moving. She let out a quiet exasperated grunt as the bell rang for lunch.

Sandra sat down at the first empty table she saw, following right behind her was Stacey. Shortly after the two of them sat down, Imene showed up. Imene tried to be friendly to Stacey, but Stacey seemed uninterested in anything Imene had to say as she jabbered on to Sandra.

"So then, I told the lady who did my nails that she had better redo them for free, because I am not paying twenty five dollars for nails that are purple, when I clearly asked for pink! I mean, I just can't believe how dense some people are. Then when it was all finished, the lady had the nerve to give me a dirty look for not giving her a tip!" Stacey complained, not realizing Sandra was barely listening.

"Stacey, some things are more important than the color of your nails! You're so immature sometimes." Sandra snapped, throwing her fork down.

Sandra almost immediately regretted it. She could tell by the look on Stacey's face that she wouldn't be able to talk her way out of this.

"Oh, well look at you Ms. All Grown Up." Stacey hissed at Sandra as she got up and grabbed her tray.

Sandra stared at her food, irritated, after watching Stacey walk away. Imene silently took a bite of her lunch.

"She shouldn't be mad at you." Imene finally said.

"She's right, I used to think just the same." Sandra replied.

"Well people change. Plus, she knows what you did, she should have been more compassionate to you then make you listen to her rant about her nails." Imene said, ridiculing Stacey.

Sandra just ate the rest of her lunch quietly. She hoped she wouldn't snap at anyone else. Knowing it wasn't her normal disposition, Sandra felt that Stacey should have known that too. Stacey would come around eventually, she would understand how much Sandra was hurting. Wouldn't she?

Stacey stormed across the cafeteria and slammed her tray down, almost spilling her drink, on the first open spot she could find. It was right beside May. May was one of the cheerleaders. She was normally nice to most people and for some reason most people confided in her, but she was one of the biggest gossips in the school.

Stacey had heard Sandra say on more than one occasion that she couldn't understand why so many people confided in May so much. She said that she could see right through her; all she was was a drama queen. The only people May ever seemed to be trustworthy for were her two best friends, and that was only when they weren't arguing.

"What's your problem?" May asked, moving her stuff over a little to give Stacey more room.

"She thinks she's all grown up now." Stacey said angrily, jabbing her mystery meat with the fork.

"You want to talk about it?" May asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

"Not really." Stacey said, taking a bite of her food. After a few minutes, Stacey dropped her fork on the tray.

"What I don't get is why is she taking it out on me. I get that it must have been hard for her to get an abortion, but she's been so mean to me all the time lately!" Stacey blurted out.

"Wow, someone has some pent up anger." May said, taking a sip of her juice.

"Do you think I'm a bad person?" Stacey asked, looking as if she were about to cry.

"Of course not! Anyone who could even consider that deserves to be miserable." May patted Stacey on the shoulder. "Anyway, getting an abortion is one of the worst sins, so whoever did it is going to Hell anyway."

"But I don't want that!" Stacey gasped, her eyes getting wide. "That can't be true!"

"That's what they told me in church, and I believe them." May finished her chocolate chip cookie. "Well, I have to go talk to my history teacher. I really hope you feel better later!" May said, sincerely.

As May walked away, Stacey turned to look at Sandra. She couldn't understand what happened to her. Sure, getting an abortion must be a hard thing to go through, but Sandra was so depressing now. Even just looking at her, you'd think she was about to cry. Stacey turned back to her tray and stared at her plate for the last five minutes of lunch.

After school, Sandra went straight to her room. After putting on her Linkin Park CD, she laid down in bed for a few minutes trying to clear her head. She checked her email. Of course there was something from Katie.

Sandra!
Why have you not responded? I don't appreciate being ignored! You have some big explaining to do! If I don't get an email tonight, I had better come back from Puerto Rico to find out you were murdered, or else I will do it myself!

Heart you!
Katie

Sandra let out a small laugh as she read the email. After typing three long emails about how she felt and what happened, Sandra deleted the last one. She had no clue how to tell Katie what happened. There was no way she could really explain how she was feeling. After debating for about ten minutes, Sandra finally decided what to type.

Katie,
Sorry I didn't answer last night.

I did it.

I'll talk to you when you get home.
Sandra

Vinny paced back and forth in the garage. He wasn't sure what to do. He had been covering for Jimmy since he decided to not show up to work the day before. After calling Jimmy every five minutes for about three hours on Wednesday, he finally answered and told Vinny he needed some time to think about things.

Apparently, Jimmy didn't care about his job anymore. Vinny thought Jimmy was being stupid, considering his green card was only kept valid as long as he had a steady job. He couldn't just stand by and watch his best friend ruin his life for a naive, immature girl. Not only that, but Vinny couldn't take another day of covering for Jimmy's shift. The garage was understaffed as it was, and Vinny wouldn't be able to get the full day's work completed by himself again; he was barely scraping by.

"I need a raise for this." Vinny said to himself as a car pulled into the parking lot.

Jimmy groggily opened his eyes. He looked at his cell phone and wished days had passed by instead of hours. Sandra hadn't called yet, and Jimmy wasn't sure if she would. Maybe Jimmy really messed up; maybe Sandra wouldn't come back. He shook his head, refusing to think that way. Jimmy wouldn't lose Sandra, he knew she probably just needed time.

Maybe she was waiting for him to call. He tried to imagine Sandra checking her phone every five minutes, the way he did when he was awake. Jimmy stood up and stretched. His stomach growled and Jimmy felt excruciating hunger pains. When was the last time he ate? Deciding to eat before he called Sandra, he made his way to the fridge to check what food was still good.